Grief Has No Timetable
After a death occurs, many people ask themselves questions like these:
“How long will I feel this way?”
“Why does it seem like my loved ones aren’t sad anymore – but I still feel so awful?”
“How is the world carrying on as usual when my life has turned upside down?”
In our personal experiences with loss, and in helping families plan a funeral, cremation, and burial, we encounter such sentiments often at Krause Funeral Homes. Grief is something that is difficult to explain to others. It’s a personal journey that is unpredictable and filled with setbacks and breakthroughs. Time and time again, our staff hears how Milwaukeeans are surprised by their reaction to death. Their emotions are often very different than they anticipated.
Some feel an almost debilitating sadness right away. Others are in a state of shock and it takes days, weeks, or even months for the reality of the death to sink in. Most feel their energy is drained. They have trouble keeping up with their usual responsibilities and instead “float” from one day to the next.
While grief doesn’t have a start and finish line, it should look different as time goes by. The hope is that feelings of peace, connectedness, and positivity will slowly reemerge. There will still be hard days, but the intensity will diminish. Here are indicators that you are moving through the grieving process:
- You start to feel more like yourself.
- Your energy and motivation increase.
- You begin to look forward to the future.
- You want to socialize and get out of the house more often.
- You can think about your loved one with fondness instead of being weighed down with sadness.
- You start to have more “good days” than “bad days.”
If you’re feeling “stuck” in your grief, there are many ways to receive the encouragement you need, like speaking with a counselor or someone else experienced in grief support, such as a pastor, priest, or rabbi. We’ve been helping families in the Milwaukee area for more than 80 years now and have many connections and numerous resources available. We also have our grief therapy dog, Bennie, on hand to offer comfort and bring a smile.
For immediate support and to learn more about the grieving process, check out our Guiding Grief Interactive Online Help. You will be guided through steps to help you find answers to many questions about grief and suggestions for your own healing or help with someone else’s healing.
Life is never the same after losing someone you love. But a “new normal” is possible. If you ever need a helping hand or listening ear, please remember we’re always here for you.